Self doubt

Self doubt. It’s a big thing! I always go back to the simple question, why? Again, it’s not a simple answer. It’s fear based, will I fail, or will it not go to plan? If there’s faith and trust there is no room for self doubt. Like most things in life, this is a work in progress. Tomorrow I attempt to run a marathon. There’s stuff I’m still carrying from my previous two attempts in 2011/12, there’s the questions about have I trained enough and all the anxiety around getting to the start line on time. Like most things, once I’m there and running it’s fine. The reality is never as bad as the anxiety. It’s a reprogramming effort and takes practice to focus on the moment rather than the future unknown. I’m going to be true to myself tomorrow, focus on the joy of running, being surrounded by amazing people all going in the same direction but all on their own individual journeys. Spread the love, that includes to myself. Acceptance that the journey will be what I make it. Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional