Screen time

This is something that has crept up on me.

I’ve always had strong opinions on the way mobiles have changed the world and lead to us becoming disconnected from reality. Over the last few years I’ve found myself wasting so much time scrolling endlessly on stuff that adds no value to me. It was never my ‘go to’ when bored, I’d always go and do something outside/in nature, a feeling of connection.

There were times over the last few years where all we had were our screens, and this is where this unhelpful habit has formed. It’s also tapped in to my ‘fears’ or things I’m generally not comfortable with. Social media has presented a reality that isn’t real, and, in a way, heightened anxiety around certain situations. As I’ve stopped and watched videos in the past over conflict (road rage, fighting, arguing, disagreements – you get the picture!) these are now what show up in my feed (despite never having searched for them). This has caused my reality to shift that these are now expected/the norm with my interaction with the real world. It’s lead to me becoming defensive (on the inside) and preparing a defence/justification when I come across other people. I expect conflict/judgement because of what I’ve now made my reality. It’s tiring!

Awareness is the first step, as with any change. I’m pretty good at being aware (eventually) but taking the next step is where I’m not so good. It’s easy to stay in the new ‘norm’ as it’s what I’m used to. I’ve let ‘the tool’ take control of me. It’s funny, things that scare me (i.e. conflict) are things I actually want to watch. I’m not sure why, maybe it’s safe to just watch, maybe there’s a hope that I become comfortable with it. Fact is that it’s a huge negative. I expect the worst out of people now which is never a good starting point and something I’d worked hard to reverse.

I need to fill my time more productively, writing being one thing, hence me being back here again. So, screen time in itself is not the issue (well, excessive time is), it’s what I do with it!